Lately, I've been hearing a lot more people admitting that they told their best friend about their pregnancy before they told their significant other. I actually can totally see this as being a good thing. While we have this romantic notion of the moment we share this big news, the truth is, it's pretty overwhelming to find out that you are expecting a baby. Even if you've been planning a pregnancy for ages, the moments when the two lines show up, your stomach lurches, your head spins, your heart races... in short, it's overwhelming.
Talking to your BFF gives you a chance to calm yourself down a bit and gather your wits. It lets you practice saying the words. It also gives you a bit of time to plot a fun way to share the pregnancy announcement. This is a great way to try to have that memorable experience that you may be hoping for when you try the announcement on for real.
A case in point, my husband and I had been trying for baby number three for a very long time. While we'd been pregnant, we'd had numerous miscarriages and basically been told that it was probably pretty hopeless for us to conceive after a nasty ectopic pregnancy and abdominal surgery. We didn't want to believe them and tried again anyway. So I find out I'm pregnant a mere three days before Valentine's Day. I really wanted to wait and to make it special. I knew if I talked to my BFF, she'd help me plan something amazing. My plan to delay telling my husband lasted all of about five minutes. As soon as I saw him, I blurted it out. The words I said, were not words I normally would have chosen, my husband heard it negatively and responded in kind. It was not a nice memory. We quickly both realized what had happened and apologized, but we couldn't get a do over. It was done. Had I waited a few minutes and talked to my friend, I would have at least had a line or two to say that wouldn't have been misconstrued in my urgency to share. Today, we laugh it off as the grief we were both feeling. I joke that I'm glad I didn't wait and spoil Valentine's Day. It's all good, but I still wish it would have been different.
So, did you tell your BFF or someone else first? Did that wind up being a good thing or a bad thing? Does your partner know?
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Telling Your BFF About Your Pregnancy First originally appeared on About.com Pregnancy & Childbirth on Saturday, July 27th, 2013 at 10:24:20.
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